The Single Question that Revived Olympian Deanna Stellato-Dudek’s Quest for Gold

I’ve been visiting family in the U.S., and for the past few evenings, it’s been delightful to sit in the living room with my sister, brother-in-law, niece and nephew, to watch the Olympics.

We were particularly hooked on pairs figure skating. It was great fun pretending that we were suddenly qualified judges, trading predictions on whose performance would get the gold. We were thrilled with the dramatic ups and downs of Miura Riku and Kihara Ryūichi, who won Japan’s first gold medal in the category.

But the story that’s going to stick with me was pairs skater American Deanna Stellato-Dudek, who gave up figure skating as a teen and restarted at age 34 – arriving at these Olympics at 42 years old, the oldest woman to compete in Olympic figure skating in nearly a century.

What I particularly loved learning was that Stellato-Dudek’s decision to return to skating came after she attended a work retreat and, in a team-building session, was asked: “What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?”

She surprised herself by answering, “I would win an Olympic gold medal.”

Later, when she reflected on this moment in an interview, she commented, “I was in disbelief of what I had just said. I thought that I had moved on with my life; it had been 16 years. I didn't know that that was still in there."

Deanna Stellato-Dudek and Maxime Deschamps perform during the pairs free skate at the 2025 World Figure Skating Championships. Photo by FloweringDagwood, CC BY 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

What Stellato-Dudek has accomplished since returning to skating has been incredible. She and her Canadian partner, Maxime Duchamps are the 2024 world champions. Stellato-Dudek became a Canadian citizen to compete with Duchamps in these Olympics. (Funnily enough, she had to quit her job to move to Montreal. The team-building question maybe didn't go in the direction that her company had in mind either. 😉)

“What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?”

The wisdom in this classic life coaching question is the knowledge that fear of failure keeps many of us from doing the things that we really want in life – and also from even allowing ourselves to imagine them.

It’s the kind of question that, if it hits you at just the right time, can spur a leap, or a radical change of direction.

Being open to truthfully answering this question is not easy. Taking action to fulfill your answer is even more difficult.

As I researched Stellato-Dudek’s story, I noticed that she always followed up the inspiring retelling of how she took the leap to pursue her dream with the reminder of how much determination and perseverance it has taken for her to fulfill it. Including, as an older skater, how much care and recovery time she needs to build into her daily training routine. She’s needed incredible discipline, patience and grit to get through injuries and other setbacks.

Stellato-Dudek sustained an injury days before the Olympic games, and we watched her fall close to the end of her short-form program. She and Duchamps eventually placed 11th in pairs.

Accepting that it’s still worthwhile to pursue your dreams even when failures are inevitable along the way is yet another important lesson in this journey.

“What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?”

Working for the first time with a life coach and contemplating questions like this one spurred me to redirect my own life at 34. Through deep guided inquiry, I discovered and committed to my own dream of taking a year off to explore what my life could look like if it was truly shaped by me and what I most valued in life, instead of what was typical or expected by others. Questions like these also helped me to take the leap to start my own business so I could work remotely from a beautiful farm in Catalonia, and become a coach who could help others with their own inquiries into themselves and their lives.

It’s a powerful question. One worth bringing out every once in a while to contemplate. If you crave more of a sense of direction and meaning to your life, your answer to this question will guide you there.